gay or not gay...?

Ever since I read Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman, I've been on a lookout for Murakami's works. Back in 2009, it was still difficult to find his books but nowadays it's way better. I should learn how to be content but sometimes it's quite a challenge when you're too fussy or too adamant. Just a few days ago I downloaded all his e-books. I do support e-books but simply because I adore his works so much, once again I went out to hunt for the physical genuine ones today (the last Murakami book I bought was about 3 weeks ago-- speak of being broke).

Saddened by the fact that most bookshops do not have a brand new copy of Kafka on the Shore, I picked up Sputnik Sweetheart. Bloody thin but I think After Dark is thinner. Despite its so called lack of content, I still bought it because the synopsis was convincing enough and it was also out of ire that they do not have a clean copy of Kafka. Yes, I'm about to get to the core of my post.

If you're easily offended by homosexuality, do not continue reading. I won't be responsible if you feel like throwing up or killing me with a gigantic crucifix after you finish reading the post (I highly doubt you'll feel like doing so, there's nothing graphic about homosexuals down there). 

"..Surprised that she might after all be a lesbian, Sumire spends hours on the phone talking to her best friend K about big questions in life..."

the word 'lesbian'. The L word to be exact (no pun intended) reminded me to update my blog.  Ponder this for a moment. Do you refer to your lesbian friends as LESBIANS? Or do you actually label them gay?

Now I've been observing people for quite some time. I can't help but notice how straight people like to label their lesbian friends as lesbians instead of gay friends. I'm not sure of other countries but in Malaysia, it is extremely rare for straight beings to say things such as "*inserts a girl's name* is gay". Prevalently, you'll hear things from straight people such as "*inserts girl's name* is a lesbian". It's like a rule that most straight beings adhere to, use the G word for males, the L word for females.

The funny thing here is (perhaps you won't find it funny but seriously, I find this REALLY funny), most lesbians like to label themselves gay or simply put, they use the word 'gay' in lieu of 'lesbian' in day to day conversations and whatnot. Of course, this is only applicable to english speaking people. I've a friend who said that she preferred being labeled 'gay' instead of a 'lesbian'. Hah.

In the LGBT community, statements like, "You're sooo gay" and "She's soooo gay" are really common but if things like that come out from your mouth when you're talking to a someone who hasn't been exposed much to LGBT related content or perhaps they themselves do not have lesbian or bisexual friends, they might give you odd looks. Now they're not to be blamed. 

With that said, I can't help suspecting that a girl/lady/woman is gay/bisexual when she uses the word 'gay' (as in to refer to all homosexuals including lesbians) because like I said, it's only common for gay girls to use that word. 

This post of mine might seem to contain stains of sophistry here and there but hey, do think about it. I have close to ZERO straight friends who use the word 'gay' when they speak of their lesbian friends. Close to zero means I do have a few straight friends who use the word 'gay' on girls. Thing is, her close friends belong to the LGBT community so she must have been exposed to terms like these. This is even more noticeable among adults. My parents/relatives/cousins who are way older than me have NEVER EVER used the word 'gay' to label female homosexuals.

Are you starting to think that my post is absurd? Believe me, this is not a joke post. I'm not babbling trash here. Your thoughts will be highly appreciated. :)

awkward moments in the living room

Certain games are only meant for playing when you're alone or when nobody's in the same room with you because video games these days are not as innocent / bubbly as they were decades ago. Sex and nudity are no longer unorthodox elements in a game.

Last night I was getting through the final hours of Heavy Rain, which include an interactive sex scene and performing striptease. When I say interactive, it means you're required to input a sequence of commands as prompted for the game to progress. Okay I was exaggerating, it wasn't entirely a interactive sex scene, more of an interactive make out scene which eventually led to sex. Unfortunately players no longer have control over the character during the sex scene.

Oh boy, it was really awkward, thanks to the presence of my mom in the living room. I like having the volume really high when I enjoy my games; thus, the characters were moaning. Thanks to her headphones, she was too busy listening to her pop tunes and hardly paid attention to what I was doing. Perfect timing because my dad went out to buy his cigarettes so no one was watching but still, there was tension in the air. 

If you think that's not much or it doesn't qualify as nudity, check this one out folks. Too bad for you if you're sensitive to boobs. Oh anyways, it's just pixels. ;) It's the shower scene where players get a close view of Madison's boobs. This scene took place last week and fortunately my dad was in his computer room.

My point is, it's just uncomfortable when you're enjoying a game but at the same time you're wishing that others do not pay any attention to you just for the sake of reducing awkwardness. I might sound stupid here because I'm already 18, it's perfectly fine for me to be playing games with sexual content but it just feels weird doing so in the living room with my parents there.

I'm gonna do a few more playthroughs to get the all the trophies. In other words, these awkward moments are inevitable.

A simple conclusion can be drawn from this, getting my own lcd/plasma is essential for full gaming comfort and enjoyment. 

Lest you have no idea what the hell is Heavy Rain, please don't make ridiculous judgments, no it's not a stupid sex hentai game. I don't dig those stuff. Those games are catered to horny people who love looking at japanese/anime looking chicks with huge breasts cry in pain when the male character inserts his very-- I think I better not go in detail. 

Photos from gamesradar.com.

Screenshots from youtube.